Saw this chart on how you can compose 10,000 impressive theological sentences while reading Phil Johnson’s article “The Do-It-Yourself Group Blogging Kit for Emerging Religious Types ” over at PyroManiac.
Those who have not yet mastered theological conversation will find this guide invaluable in conversing with peers and authorities. Simply think of any 4-digit number (say, 6518) and read off the similarly numbered phrases from columns A, B, C, and D. (For example, 6518 is “In the last analysis, the homiletic problem is further compounded by considering global perspectives.”) Never mind what it means; just use it and watch the way you bring conversation to a halt. You can compose profound reports by using varied number combinations.
As you become more proficient in its use, you may wish to experiment with varying the column sequence, e.g. , BACD, CBAD, etc. These advanced configurations are not recommended for beginners, however, requiring as they do sophisticated dexterity with punctuation.
|Column A||Column B||Column C||Column D|
|1||A formal analysis will quickly show that||the meaning of major elements||is further compounded by considering||the relevant dynamics of Luke-Acts.|
|2||From an exegetical point of view||the linguistic consideration||imposes smothering constraints upon||the ramifications of consensus-building|
|3||Although Moltmann does not state it in so many words, the implication||a structural dynamic analysis||necessitates that urgent consideration be made of||the clarity of the sociological dimensions.|
|4||There can be no doubt that||the eschatological structure||adds considerable urgency to||the unfortunate faux-pas of neo-orthodoxy.|
|5||Based upon interdisciplinary considerations||the homoletic problem||calls into question||any attempt to introduce historical analysis.|
|6||In the last analysis||the liturgical perspective||must give way to||an emphasis on dogmatics.|
|7||From a strictly theological view point||the introduction of gnosticism||orients the serious scholar toward||undue reliance on derivative materials.|
|8||Most scholars seem to have forgotten that||the underlying question||provokes an examination of||global perspectives.|
|9||Under the guise of liberalism||an ahistorical stance||tends toward||excessive use of the 19th century frameworks.|
|0||One might say||a need to master the data||drives us to consider||a soteriological point of view.|