June 9, 2005

You Might Be a Presbyterian If . . .

JollyBlogger has come up with a pretty good start on his You Might Be a Presbyterian If . . . post. Here are the ones I thought hit the spot:

You might be a Presbyterian if . . .

2. You can spell supralapsrian , suprlapsarian, suralapsrian, supralapsarian.

3. When asked to name the twelve apostles you say Matthew, John, James, Andrew, Peter, Nathaniel, Phillip, Simon, Thomas, Augustine, Luther and Calvin.

7. When the spirit comes upon you in power, you don’t raise your hands and shout Hallelujuah, rather you scratch your chin, turn to your neighbor and whisper “hmmm, . . . that was a good point.”

8. You think fencing has something to do with the Lord’s Supper instead of swords.

10.  When someone asks you a question about the Bible, you answer, “Well, the confession says . . . ” or “the catechism says . . . ”

16. You think the phrase “chosen frozen” is a compliment.

He then asks others to join him -

in poking fun at their own denomination, theological tradition or group.  We could have a “you might be a charismatic if . . .”, “you might be a dispensationalist if . . .” and so on.

Go visit his site to read more and to contribute.


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4 Comments »

  1. 1

    Hahaha! Those are great. These two from the website hit home:

    4. You used to be a Baptist.

    1. You started drinking (“in moderation” of course) after you left the Baptist church and became a Presbyterian.

    So true! Although I still rarely drink, the whole Baptist (or similar evangelical denomination) becoming Reformed seems to almost define Reformed churches these days.

    I think #7 made me laugh the most. :-)

    Comment by Pat — June 10, 2005 @ 6:52 am


  2. 2

    Reading the comments over at JollyBlogger and liked this addition:

    your firstborn son is named Calvin and your firstborn daughter Geneva

    Comment by Gary Paulson — June 13, 2005 @ 11:24 pm


  3. 3

    I also saw Matthew Self’s list of “You might be a Vineyardite if …” and got a good chuckle. Especially #7:

    You might be a Vineyardite if …

    1. You think church planting begins with an acoustic guitar and a stool.

    2. You’ve ever begun a prayer with the official, “Oh God, Oh God, Oh God …”

    3. When shaking someone’s hand, the shaking is involuntary.

    4. You don’t have a problem serving the sacrament using grape Kool-Aid and Pop Tarts.

    5. You don’t know any Church songs or hymns written before 1982.

    6. You own more khaki pants than a Gap clerk.

    7. When quoting from Calvin, it’s accompanied by cartoon slides of a stuffed tiger and a 5-year-old boy.

    Comment by Gary Paulson — June 13, 2005 @ 11:27 pm


  4. 4

    When quoting from Calvin, it’s accompanied by cartoon slides of a stuffed tiger and a 5-year-old boy.

    Hahaha! I visited a friend of mine’s church this spring, and it was about like that. :)

    Comment by Pat — June 14, 2005 @ 3:40 pm


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